How to Build Confidence in Your Kids
Children need to learn that they are valued for who they are rather than how well they perform, yet often this belief can be altered by others’ views and values, including relatives, teachers, coaches, religious leaders, scout leaders, or friends.
Children should experience various value systems in order to learn how to become open-minded adults. Parents should screen out people who lower their child’s self-esteem while encouraging those who build it up.
Encourage Your Child
Confidence is essential to your child’s psychological and social well-being, but developing it takes work–it begins as early as preschool! How kids perceive themselves can greatly influence their behavior and success; children assess themselves based on how others view them.
That is why it is crucial for parents to encourage their children to explore new topics, take on challenging activities, and set goals. Furthermore, helping your kids cope with failure and setbacks – both parts of life – can be especially crucial. When children feel intimidated or fearful to make mistakes they won’t experience their full potential; by helping overcome their fears they can build confidence for lifelong success as adults.
Children can gain confidence from watching how adults treat each other and observing the interaction among themselves. Children can also develop strong senses of identity by being part of families and communities such as religious organizations or sports teams.
Make sure that the praise your kids receive focuses on effort rather than results or fixed abilities (such as straight A’s). Children can build their self-confidence further by seeing just how helpful they can be in the home; encouraging them to help with tasks like feeding pets or watering plants will show that their contributions are valued as part of a team and appreciated as valued team players.
Risky play can help enhance learning and creativity; just ensure it fits with their age and stage of development.
Help Your Child Set Goals
One effective strategy for helping children build self-confidence is encouraging them to take risks and reach for their dreams, says Hovington. However, this does not require pushing them beyond their comfort zones – rather, building on strengths such as learning a foreign language or enrolling in challenging classes can provide the basis for this growth.
“Completing something they have worked at for so long is an amazing feeling of achievement,” according to Leary. Even small victories like coloring within the lines or climbing their first tree can help boost kids’ self-confidence.
Assuring your children you know how you cope with fear is also key. For instance, if you feel nervous about presenting at work, let them witness how you manage this fear by pushing through. They’ll learn valuable life lessons as a result!
Furnival suggests another effective strategy for encouraging your children to be brave is showing them you believe in them – this could include anything from giving a simple hug to telling them they will perform admirably on an assignment, he adds.
Hovington emphasizes the importance of teaching your children to love themselves and maintain healthy relationships, including choosing friends who will have positive influences on them. If children surround themselves with negative influences such as relatives, coaches, teachers, religious leaders, or scout leaders it could negatively affect their self-esteem; screening out any that could potentially have an adverse impact.
Ask Your Child for Help
Many parents believe that confident children are more likely to take healthy risks, say yes when asked and accept new challenges with ease. So how can you support their development without restricting it?
Begin by encouraging them to help. Even small tasks, like helping make dinner or washing dishes, will give your children a sense of ownership and competency, according to Furnival. Ask your children to write lists of people they love (including themselves!) in order to foster self-love and foster healthy relationships between self-esteem and the unique aspects of who they are as an individual.
Young children don’t often have much control over their lives. They must adhere to bedtimes and school routines while eating certain foods. Therefore, giving age-appropriate choices such as clothing or the color of toothpaste helps young ones develop autonomy and feel powerful in themselves.
One effective way to help children build confidence is by encouraging them to try out new things, according to Pickhardt. This may involve offering them the choice between selecting a sport or club at school or working on an art project at homeschool.
Hovington emphasizes the importance of allowing kids to fail. They need to learn that setbacks happen and it’s okay if you feel nervous or don’t do well at something. Dweck’s research demonstrated that rewarding effort instead of intelligence (e.g. telling your child you liked their colors used instead of saying “I love how you stayed within the lines”) increases confidence more effectively than showering them with praise alone.
Spend Plenty of Time With Your Child
Lacking confidence can rob kids of the chance to try new activities and develop their abilities, hindering their future prospects. Parents and teachers can help foster children’s self-esteem by encouraging them to try out different activities and expand their skill set.
Children develop their sense of competence at an early age, such as when they first crawl or take their first steps, but true confidence doesn’t develop until about preschool age when children can test boundaries and make decisions on their own. “Children need to see they can accomplish many things on their own, not waiting for someone else to tell them,” according to Carl Pickhardt, psychologist, and author of 15 parenting books.
Parents often struggle to allow their kids to take healthy risks, yet that is exactly what is needed to build confidence. Victoria Sopik of Kids & Company, an after-school program. says taking chances, making choices, and solving problems are necessary components of feeling secure within society.
One way to help children develop confidence is by encouraging them to pursue something that interests them – like dancing lessons or theater classes – they will be more likely to believe in themselves if they find what excites them and pursue it.
Last, but not least, it is crucial to spend quality time with children and listen to what they say when they speak. Ignoring or diverting attention away from what a child says sends the message that their opinion doesn’t matter; giving your full focus to your kid will show them they matter in life as much as you do.
