Becoming a positive parent can help build up your child’s self-esteem, creativity, sense of confidence in themselves and the future, ability to get along with others and facilitate healthy development in children. Being positive also promotes physical fitness among your offspring while aiding with any challenges that may arise in their development process.
Being an effective parent requires parents to be both caring and firm, here are some tips on being an outstanding one!
1. Set Clear Expectations
An essential aspect of positive parenting is setting clear expectations for your child. This means being specific about what they should do, while providing clear reasons why their expectations exist.
Effective communication also includes communicating consistently with your children and following through with consequences when they breach family rules, to eliminate much of the nagging, bargaining and power struggles associated with parenting.
As an example, if your rule states that all electronics must be off by 7:00 pm and your children fail to comply, then they will be grounded from electronics for the remainder of the night. Be consistent so they understand you do not make exceptions from rules except in an emergency situation.
Keep in mind that children develop at different rates, so do not compare your children to their peers as this could damage them and encourage negative attitudes in them.
Positive parents do not employ physical punishment to change behavior in the long term and it can have long-term negative impacts such as low self-esteem and secretiveness. Positive parenting techniques focus on building loving connections between you and your children through respectful relationships and setting clear expectations; this will enable your children to become resilient, confident and caring adults.
2. Praise Your Child
Saying, “Good Job,” may seem easy enough, but to truly praise kids you must go further. Instead of simply repeating that phrase you should give specific examples of their behavior that made you proud – such as listening without complaining or following instructions without interruption for instance – so they know exactly why their praise should come.
Dweck suggests it’s equally essential to praise children on their efforts rather than results when providing praise for children. When praise solely focuses on results, however, children may struggle with failure and develop less intrinsic motivation; praise that focuses on effort helps a child feel like part of a team while giving them something worthwhile to work towards.
Praise is most impactful when delivered immediately following an appropriate behavior, making the accomplishment stand out in their mind and showing you are invested in their success. Reward positive behaviors by telling your children if they do it again you’ll give them something special like extra screen time, snacks or family activities as an incentive – they might get one!
The key is making sure that rewards don’t fall too far either way; an excessively large reward could send the message that they are better than other people and lead them to doubt their own abilities, while an inadequately small one might prove demotivating and not encourage further development.
3. Reward Good Behavior
Rewarding good behavior is an integral component of successful parenting. Rewarding is often more effective than punishing, since children tend to repeat behaviors which receive rewards, and using positive reinforcement rather than punishment can help lower stress levels for both you and your child.
Parents generally agree that kids deserve rewards for good behavior. Finding a balance is key: too much praise will cause children to tune out positive messages and begin acting negatively instead. Focus on specific, descriptive encouragement rather than general praise: for instance, say something like: Rather than saying, “Good job putting on socks,” try saying instead: ‘I love how you put those socks all the way up on your feet!’
If your child doesn’t respond to rewards, you may need to adapt your approach. Strong-willed kids often don’t respond well to rewards; so once you know what motivates them based on their individual temperament, be sure to consistently provide it; it will likely have greater effect if it occurs within days rather than months later.
When using a rewards system with your child, be sure to give them some control of what they would like as an incentive for good behavior. Doing this helps them feel accountable and fosters independence.
4. Distract Your Child
Parenting can be one of the most challenging professions on Earth. Kids don’t come with manuals and there are so many parenting techniques out there it can be hard to know which are best suited to each child. Positive parenting is an evidence-based approach which emphasizes celebrating positive behaviors while curbing any undesirable ones instead of correcting or punishing them.
Positive parenting techniques involve employing emotion coaching to teach your children how to regulate their emotions, which in turn reduces negative behaviors. Furthermore, positive parenting involves setting effective and brief consequences in response to misbehavior; teaching children the correct behavior while at the same time redirecting misdeeds with quick consequences that are effective but never abusive or violent – just the way true positive parenting should be! Positive parenting does not involve hitting, smacking or screaming your way to success – only patience!
Remembering that even adults experience frustration and feel overwhelmed at times can help your child understand it’s okay for them to experience feelings of anxiety from time to time. By using words that acknowledge everyone has bad days without passing judgment on their difficulties, your language could help your child understand that sometimes their emotions can take over their logic.
Parents face a challenge in understanding what motivates disruptive or negative behaviors; oftentimes it stems from need for attention, wanting to be heard or seen, feeling powerless over life events or needing something tangible and physical as relief. Connecting with your child, acknowledging their emotions and offering healthy solutions like taking a walk, singing a song or playing with toys may help.
5. Be Compassionate
Positive parents offer unconditional and consistent love to their child, making them feel secure while providing needed support in areas of need. A good parent recognizes and acknowledges accomplishments while encouraging positive behavior. Parents should seek to discipline their children without resorting to physical violence or degradation, since physical punishment often does not change behavior permanently and may lead to low self-esteem, secretiveness and revenge plotting. Value should be shown through discipline – valued children cooperate while devalued ones resist. Discipline that increases anxiety through shouting or humiliating only makes matters worse and may cause emotional burnout for both parent and child, leading to more unwanted behavior in return.
Compassion does not mean caving in to an insistent child’s demands or overindulging their desires; rather it should encourage them to be considerate of others in various ways – from considering others’ feelings when communicating with doormen and mailmen to teaching children the value of helping those less fortunate than themselves and acknowledging when they do it.
As parents, we can teach compassion by listening empathetically when our children ask us questions about life; reminding them that everyone has unique perspectives; modeling this behaviour ourselves and showing our children that being kind to themselves is part of being compassionate humans.
6. Don’t Give Up
Parents need to maintain their own sense of calm and discipline, which may be difficult when your child acts up. Try to remain focused on the behavior, rather than your emotions; understand why your child is acting this way, and find ways to address his or her needs; this can help avoid power struggles and emotional outbursts in front of your children.
Physical punishment should never be used as a means to change long-term behavior; it can even foster feelings of disrespect and lead to more secretive behaviour or plots for revenge. Instead, positive parenting focuses on nurturing and guiding children, helping them make decisions independently, encouraging open communication within families, as well as providing them with a sense of belonging that fosters individuality and self-esteem development in children.
Spending quality time with your children doing something they enjoy is paramount to their development and bonding with you and showing your care. Simple steps such as going for a walk or playing games will enable your child to feel closer and show them just how much you value them. When siblings fight, encourage them to work it out between themselves without you intervening; this teaches healthy conflict resolution skills which can aid their later relationships and promote better interpersonal connections throughout their lives. Furthermore, children raised in homes where parenting practices promote positivity often exhibit better academic performance and more positive attitudes toward education overall.